confused, misunderstood, friendship, relationship? happy,.... excited,... disappointed,... heartbroken,..... love,...... hatred???? jealously,... tention..... forgiving, understanding..... care,... unconditional,... hope,... yearn,..... joy,.... bitterness,..... sleep,.... floats,..... tip-toe,.... sweat,.... cold,.... smiles,.... dance,.... whatever7
words i have for 3 differnt stories of my life.......
wow!!!!!!! today was such a dancey day!!!!!!!!!!! stayed back after school to work on our carnival day dance. my god!!!!!!!!!! even though, we did not do much, i loved the company of my dancers!!!!!!!! jamie made my day!!!!!!
we were both so very ego!!!!!!
hahahaha,.we kept saying that people are trying to seduce us!!!!!!!!! that we keep seducing eachother, and pretend that only that super grade humans do that!!!! hahahaha (ok, at this juncture, i would like you to assume that i am slapping my own face, but i am freakin laughing off my chair)
anyway,... i love talking to her la, my honey honey!!!!!
daph was so cute today!!!! we kept like eye contact when crooked things are said!!!!! hahahahaha,.... wa lao,... i still think dap and zan make like the best pair, bout the same height, same style, skinny, and so freakin danceified!!!!
sorta crappy today, hahahaha, weather's fault, weather's fault....
i forgot what we did, but it was fun!!!!!!!!! nut left early for her meeting, and came back when i had to go=( but with her, things are like more uniformed, like we seriously practiced when she came back!!! hahahaha,...
you know me and jamie, were so pervertic!!!! to me maybe not, but to others it does look pretty sick!!!!! hahahaha,... cant stand her la,. this freakin bimbo.
i was pretty touched today. dahlia brought spagitti for me from home( ok,... i cant spell it la, some kind of westen noodle, you know whats that la dumbo). cuz i have dance and i dont have time to go for recess. i was shocked cuz there was like chopsticks!!!! hahahaha,... imagine if she did not bring them!!!!! i ate it during mt,... people were staring at me, cuz the smell of it was really good!!!!!!! hahahahaha,... you people out there are just plain jealous!!!!!hahahahahaha,.... bad mean dana, how could you say that?????
ya la, and this stupid dahlia,.... go and tell me that she wont do the cover our head thingy and squat down thingy, cuz its dumb,.... i actually was sorta serious!!!!! then when i saw her at the circular block,... i really dont know wether to do or not la!!!!!!!! lame lame lame!!!!!!!!!
i cant believe i actually talked to dahlia like so long ytd. we were like, hey!!!!!! 3 more minutes to 2am!!!!!!!!!!! hahahahahaha, wanted to break record!!!!!! i am like quite imtimitated yesterday by my mum cuz she came out of the room and caught me talking on the phone at 1.57am!!!!!!!! hahahaha, talked bout crap that YOU dont need to know. luckily my mum did not really scold me la. hahahaha, that was close!!!!!!!!!!
went to parkway after dance to buy yaya's present!!! hahahaha, bought 2 converse shirt for her birthday!!!!!!!! like hey!!!!who buys 2 shirts for their friends' birthday?????
anyway, a-nut is like complaining to me bout some really silly stuff,.... welcome to the club of tolerance!!!!! hahahaha,... daph and jamie too!!!!!!
dance till you drop, dance till you drop!!!!!!!
that previous post was written yesterday, couldnt post it cuz blogger was down
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ok,... today was rainy. and so gay!!!! this 2 terrible people fiona and sandy, they kept 'distracting' me!!!! arrrrr!!!! they are so bad!!!!
during recess jamie, my dear 2e1er tied french braid for me!!!! i rmb last year so many people know how to tie, but this year in this new class no one knows,-_-. dance was fun!!!! i love my bimbos and i love my rival cool group!!!! fi and sand were so nice they bought pao for me.
anyhow, caught dahlia trying to sketch me from behind cuz i can feel someone looking. hahaha, damn gay!!!! at first she did not want to let me see but then she showed me the drawing later la. and i ended looking so fat!!! hahaha, but nice try.....
my history was so sucky!!! arrgh!!!!
during english was very 'funny' fi and snady(not sandy) changed the english story paper to some other crappy embarrassing thing. i was like what the hell!!!!! and i was called to read like the first half. then dahlia(dont know why her) got called to read the 2nd half. they nothing better to do, try to give her the 'edited' part, my god!!!! i dont know what they changed it to man!!!!
and they kept laughing!!!! arrgh!!!! and shila, this terrorising girl was terrorising me the whole day with her evil look!!!! i was so scared can?????
oh,... went to have a lunch date at macs with the dancers! it was so fun being with them!!! nat, nut-the-deaf, jam, belle and azrina( girl, dont be too upset k?)
it was raining damn heavily la,... i still got soaked even though i had an umbrella!!!
had a headache doing maths! uggh,
suddenly grace called and i knew it was dahlia la,... she told me she wanted to come to katong mall fix her boots or sth. then when i when i realised that the shop was closed, i tried to call her la, then i realised i cant reach her,. i called grace, charmaine, and even jamie la, to know where she is and get syz no.
decided to wait for her la,... then i heard 'dana!!!!' from across the street. ok,... she had to go a long long way to cross the road la. hahahaha,... talked crap on the bus!!! and i paid for her bus fare!!!! she ah!!! so went home together again. so we WE ARE SO BLOODY GAY.
are you going to call me tonight?
ok, no la no la
i know you want!
what makes you think i want, huh!?
hahahaha
TODAY WAS AH CRAP!!!!! I FEEL LIKE A MEAN MONSTER!!!! I FEEL LIKE I AM SO BAD!!! THAT I AM SUCH A BITCH!!!! ITS NOT SUPPOSED TO BE LIKE THAT!!!! ARRRGH!!!!! OK,... planned to go home with dahlia if we are both still in school,... it was raining so super heavily,... then jana told me dah was looking for me. then i went to the foyer and midway,... saw her like throughly wet,... and i saw her running to hug me and i was like,... oh,... dont!!!!! anyway,... we were waiting for the rain to stop at the foyer,... and i saw this person,... and hahahaha, called annabelle to come back,... and the whole group of them came back from the video shop. azrina told me they were all waiting for me!!!!! i felt sooooo bloody remorseful man!!!!!!!! OH MY GOD!!!! SO SORRY BABES!!!!! I REALLY REALLY FEEL SO BAD!!!! ANYHOW, we went to the canteen and practically did nothing,... for about like 20 mins or less la,... decided to go find dah least she think i went back without her. hahaha so funny,... we met halfway again!!! like i went to find her and she came to find me! at the same place somemore!! hahaha,... i told her i felt really very bad!!!! and i ask dah to meet me at the toliet there she borrowed a huge green poncho and it reminded me of obs!!!! haha anyways hid at the video shop first. my god!!!! i really left my dancers and smuggled out!!!! i felt so sinful!!!! i dont know what to say man!!!! sorry azrina! sorry natasha! sorry jamie! sorry annebelle! MY GOD..... besides this, i really feel very very bad for s and n, i mean,... i know how it feels and i am so bloody doing it. arrrgh!!!!!!!! i am so sorry!!!!! i dont know!!!! arrgh!!!! i cant help but like try to avoid you guys!!!! deep in my heart, i feel like a monster,... man,... i dont even know what you guys are thinking of me..... i dont blame you for hating me, maybe,... arrrrrgh!!!!! andandand SANDY AND FIONA!!!!!! my 2 precious darlings!!!! i am so sorry!!!!! i must have neglected you guys so much!!!!! you guys are so irriplacable!!!! oh my!!!!!! i really dont blame you by daoing me,... but I hope this wont last forever!!!!
Its it worth it? Let me work it. Put my thing down flip it and reverse it
wow,..... today was like a roller coaster ride man. it was like this actually in a graph format. hahahaha, i was really lucky to have steph who understands everything,... =)
the nicest bimbo in earth!!!!!
and dumb social studies test,... i actually realised that there was a 2nd question which is like 12 marks at the back 3mins before we had to pass it up,... can you believe it??? my cant stand myself man,....
thanks to sandy and fiona who comforted me, you guys are my darlings!!!!
had chem song presentation, it was sorta crappy, hahaha, sandy's so funny
went for dance instead after school, i did not have my pe shirt so i dance in the bloody blouse. it was terrible man!!!!! did not even dance properly!!! anyways,.... we had fun!!!!
annabelle so cute when shes excited!!!! she started telling me her cutey stuff and i was like laughing!!!!
andand and we played charades!!!!! it was bloody fun!!!! the bimbos vs the cool, hahahahaha
lost count who won!!!!
anyways,.... loved it!!!!!
hahaha,... could have gone back with dahlia, but she la!!!! tell me so late!!!! i think my phone got problem,... cannot call anybody=(
ok,...on thursday, i enjoyed playing tennis with DAHLIA, cuz she is so 'fun' and gives me nonsense balls and says 'thank you' when i praise myself-_- ya,... hahaha, dahlia,... HERE GOES,.....as YOU WANTED,....hahahaha
DAHLIA IS THE BEST OF THE BEST BEST BEST!!!!
LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE YOU!!!!!!!
shit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the post that i have just written was lost in a blink!!!!!!!! i guess there must be at least 500 words!!!!! arrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i hate you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I WANT POINT SHOES!!!! I WANT POINT SHOES!!!!!!!!! I WANT POINT SHOES!!!!!!!!!!! I WANT, I WANT, I WANT!!!!!!!!!! I WANT POINT SHOES!!!!!!!!!! ARRRRRGH!!!!!! THEY ARE SO FREAKIN PRETTY!!!!!!!!!! I AM SIZE 5 OR 5 1/2. BUY FOR ME!!!!!! I WANT I WANT!!!!!!!
I tried shihuas one today, and i fell right in love with it man!!!!!!love love, point shoes!!!! dont love you!!!! hahhahaha,....
ok,.... give me a few boasting seconds here k? its my blog, bitch!!! hahaha, kidding... you know right,... last time, like 5 years ago, when i was still taking ballet,.... i was pretty good at it,.... ok la,... good la. my ballet teacher always ask me to show the class how to do the steps,.... and even though its dumb, believe me,... she always ask people to crowd around my feet and she wound ask me to point.... ya,...and show them that 'your feet is suppose to curve like a banana',... ok,... i love my feet...haha. is got the point!!!! hahahaha,... but you know what,... i learn things damn slow
so its like i always feel lost, and silly.....
arrgh,... feel like floating around la,.... i dont like today and i dont like you.... what am i talking about???? hahahaha,.... why am i like so down lately???? and guess what,... i forgot how to upload songs on my itunes,... cuz i use windows. AND NOW,... i cant do anything with my ipod.... i rmb last time i also tikam tikam one.... oh so silly
today, drenched daphane, cuz its her BIRTHDAY, BABE!!!!! we used water bottles and then splashed on everyone!!!! haha,.... made the whole of third floor wet,... went back to class wet, i told people it was raining ,,....hahahahaha,
i doublt daph enjoyed herself! hahahaha,...
got in trouble though,.... have to see mdm lenny 2moro, all 9 of us =( hahahahahaha, but i was like laughing la,.... mdm lenny came to my class and ask if we knew who did the water thingy at the corridor,... ya,... had to admit what,... i mean there is no way to hide la,..... then i told her it was me la, and the dancers. yea,.... went to 3/5 and jamie came out.... wrote down all our names and all,.....
well,.... hahahahahaha,... i enjoyed myself la/.....
......whatever,.... cant believe i am so flickle!!!!!
someone teach me how to put a song on my blog!!!!!!!!,.... cuz now i am crazy over this song called ' unbelievable' by craig david, i mean, i have always loved his songs, all of them,....
yea,.
and all those ppl who tagged me,.... thank you, you guys so rock=)
and yea, i think when i am stressed i get egoistic,was talking to dahlia just now and i realised how ** i was.... sorry la,... hahahahaha
kuku,.... i am so sorry!!!!!!!!! you really changed it to saturday???? i feel very bad leh!!!!!!!!
i think i can make it,... but i have to leave earlier leh,,.... sorry babey!!!!
ohhhhhhh,....... saw OG todayy!!!!!!! okok,.... i was about to enter the room with shi hua then, i felt sth not right, cuz shi hua was smiling to me...... like weridly,... ok,... then as expected,... it was OG!!!!! he and his friend was coming out,. as you know the passage way was cramp, so we had to squeze. then, i was really trying to control myself, cuz i was beginning to get high,.... then, that MRS FUN!!!!!! she was so bad!!!!!!!! even though she was teaching,... she stared at me hard and kept smiling to me to see what expression i would have since HE was there. i was really trying to show NO emotion cuz you know,... and shihua would know,... that i would get very high and would just smile and laugh for no reason. then when i got into the class room,..... i started laughing and laughing,... and suddenly, i pointed rudely at A BAG. it was his bag!!!!! in my class room!!!! " i think i almost shouted" why is this bag doing here????!!!! cuz, we sit in 4s oppositite each other, and his bag is like oppositite where i am sitting!!!!!
hahahahaha,... then my teacher was like,.... no la, the boys only put their bags here for awhile only la, why???? ok,.....
anyway, later, when he came in the take his bag,...we were both trying to avoid eachother, i was staring at my blank paper, and he was staring at the wall,... it was bloody werid i tell you,....
hahaha,... ok when the lesson was over, OG tried to look inside my classroom!!!!! so cute!!!!!! ahahahahahaha,....
the feeling just came back, so unusual,.....
anyhow,.... that day after dance,... i was OG at the bus stop, shanise and azrina were like, hey, hes cute, then i was like,.... ok,.... i was like, pretending i did not know him at all. thenwhen shanise left, i told azrina" ok, thats OG, " then, i remembered her, shouting,.... 'you serious?????' hahahaha, ok,..... i hope he comes to our busstop more often,....
shit, cant get her words out of my head....
man,... i feel like crying,.... just got back from dance.... had our rehearsal for the performance at victora theatre. azrina told me the other day that they were in the play as the grandmother's friends, i thought nothing of it cuz i thought it was only 2 or 3 of them, and somemore, just the friends of the grandmother, nothing too fantastic. i was like, nvm, i will be in sth else la,....
ok, then today, reality slapped me hard on my face,... i wasnt going to do anything besides my own malay dance with me doing dumb repetitive steps mr fathu dont bother to change,... i was upset enough not doing all those nice nice steps others are doing,. i mean and i know that he does not care,... he just put us in order of sizes,... he does not care who could do better, who looks better, as long as the dance is done up and he has fulfilled his duty. i mean that is so selfish.
i wanted to do all those steps others are doing,.. i know i can do it so so much better. and i really feel like slapping them cuz its like they cant even be bothered bout it and dont bother to improve their moves, they show attitute and some even proclaim that how unlucky they were to do this difficult step. they know who they are. the lucky shit.they arent aware. those freakin kiddy-minded people.
yes, i am angry and perhaps i am jealous, i seriously think i dont deserve any shitty position i have. ok,... i do sound so bitchy here, but i cant help it, i say what i feel on my blog. juniors, idiotic sec2s, majority of you,. i really despise you man. luckily i have my seniors and they too hate the sec2s . man, given the chance i should have just tell mr fathu bout it, it was them that made him so angry in the first place,. they dont care, show attitute faces, heckcare, anyhow dance,... no wonder he got so pissed and started cutting the parts that deserved people like si wei and i should have done. cuz there are people like them who go around pissing people with black shitty faces and then make mr fathu so angry that he dont even remember that there are living people still passionate bout dancing.
man,.... maybe this is life, there MUST be people born to upset your life, in whatever you do,...
ok,... if reality slapped me hard today,... i think it could just kill me. with those thorns getting more intense, i think people put fertilisers for it to grow.
back the the grandmother's friends part,.....( let, me put it bluntly, the bitch is talking) I WAS SUPPOSE TO BE IN IT, THERE WAS NO OTHER REASON WHY. i blame myself, fate i guess, i cant stand it, i put on a straight face, i really want to cry, why must i be sick? i know for this i dont blame anyone,... i even try not to blame myself, but how????? i mean,... i really dont think i just deserve to be sitting at the back stage for the rest of the time after freakin malay dance. while all the time other people are doing the play part, the story line. I, would be just doing nothing, feeling useless, how bad can somethimg get? malay dance like that, now like that. if they malay dance girls get to change costumes to be the 'friends',... i beg you, you just bring out your great grandfather's rifle and shoot me straight at my brain immediatly.
i mean, well, ok, i admit i am very spoilt. cuz last year i had nice fleshy parts for all my performance,... and i was sort of taking it for granted. but, if they can prove to me that they can dance so much better, my anger would just disappear in a blink,.... but, its sad cuz i know if i were to do it, i would be able to push myself to be better. well,... i know it makes no sense here and if you, reading this, are raising your eye brow, please, just pretend you understand even if you dont, and feel sorry for me,... i feel so sorry for myself,...
luckily, i still have my dance friends, staying strong with me, thanks for keeping me company when i was bored sitting down watching the others today, jamie, limin, daphane, steph, and a whole lot others, thank you lots,...
i want to love again man
today i woke up at 7 and i knew i was going to be late la. i woke my bro and mum up, and then rushed and rushed. sent daren first, and when i reached the gate,. the bell rang, then i just walked to the front gate alone. there was like only one girl there, and i thought,.... wow.... only 2 of us late in the whole school ah, not bad eh.
ok,.... the camelia came in smiling , then, 2 other girls then a few more,..... ok, thats more like it. after everyone left the parade square,... we were lead to the platform,.... and we stood there in a line atomatically. haha, so funny, like its a routine to get here to get scolded.suddenly,... one whole bunch of late comers joined us,... like wowwwww,... so many like bout 11-12
ok,... then mrs chia came and look at us....'late comers is it????' ' ya,.....'
then she looked at me,.... i almost burst out laughing man,... she stood so close to my face,... i could almost kiss her!!! ' why are you late? sleep late is it??? study for test is it??? i was already controlling myself cuz,.. i was just staring at her face and she look quite serious,... i mean,,... her face was like 7cm away from mine. the interesting thing is,... she is actually shorter than me leh,... cuz i have to look down,... waaa..... got ppl shorter than me leh. and i was nodding my head the whole time. then mdm lanny was like, this girl late the 3th time already, this one 4th time, this one 6th time. camelia and i were like so happy, chatting on the way up, even though we got booked!!!! but so fun leh!!!!! we were discussing whether to try it again!!!! hahahaaahahaha,.... ceri and shila was like' i thought you pon school again ah!!!!"
love shila today,.... she was in a good mood i guess. normally, she wont even smile. and she looks damn cute when she sleeps la,... i cant stop laughing,... she looks so innocent man
anyway,... after school went to KFC with my dad and bro. man,.... delicious!!! slacked all the way until now. stupid brother of mine,... go download some virus,... then sth wrong with the com now.... i cant get into my msn, so i would appear offline lately.
i have dance tomorrow,... i am aching like hell man,... why must dance be on monday????,... live throughout the week with aches,.... used to be on friday,... then shi hua and i would go to tution limping,. hahaha,... like we have problem sitting down...hahaha,.so funny leh, then now.... aches throughout the week!!!! wednesday is the worst la,... tuesday, is like ok,... its coming then wednesday's the killer. wonder how i am going to survive..... arrrrrrrr,... all the way from my neck to my back to my legs and even my fingers,.... awwwwwww
and the sole of my feet are hopfully not going to peal,... it is like so sore now,... dumb plasters dont stick, if not i would die if it peals,. like dancing on raw skin,... scary right??? i think you should see how my feet was like last time give you night mares man... ohohohohoh and i need help with that turing thingy( open, turn open turn, open turn turn thingy)!!!!! i look so dumb and i cant turn more cuz my skin will come off!!!!!
arrrr,.... chem was sucky today.... but i think i can at least pass.... ai ya..
Everytime We Touch - Cascada
I still hear your voice,
When you sleep next to me.
I still feel your touch, in my dreams.
Forgive me my weakness,
But I dont know why,
Without you it's hard to survive
(chorus)
'Cause every time we touch,
I get this feeling
And every time we kiss,
I swear I can fly
Can't you feel my heart beat fast,
I want this to last,
Need you by my side
'Cause every time we touch,
I feel the static,
And every time we kiss,
I reach for the sky,
Can't you hear my heart beat slow,
I can't let you go,
I Want you in my life.
Your arms are my castle,
Your heart is my sky.
They wipe away tears that i've cried
The good and the bad times,
We've been through them all.
You make me rise when I fall..
(chorus)
love this song,... you should hear the piano version man,....
sandy and i were singing this song and that ' so sick' song the whole day la,... i bet it irritated the ppl round us.... i notice that grace was secertly listening eh..... hahaha
so sick of love songs, so tired of tears........